*It is also important to mention that when I say squid, I mean: squid, octopi, and cuttle fish. Also known as cephalopods.
I cannot even watch a video of these things without squealing in horror like a little girl. Though, I do on occasion spend an hour or two trying to find the most terrifying video possible and make myself watch the whole thing, from start to finish. No matter how many times it takes me. It's some sort of sick masochistic thing that I don't care to try and explain.
Why they are so fucked up:
1.) The Ink Sack
Though the ink they squirt at predators is mostly melanin, a large portion is made up of mucus, or "snot." "What makes this so fucked up?" you might ask. Well, that it comes out of their anus. That's right, that cute little pink octopus in Finding Nemo? She is shooting out butt-snot.
2.)The Beak
Now, I won't mention the obvious freak of nature here. The fact that there is a BEAK on a sea-creature. No, that I can forgive because God can be pretty fucked up. (ie: The platypus). What I speak of is its inherent evil. First, poor creatures are entangled in their disgusting tentacles and just when they think they might have a chance, this evil fucking bird beak comes out of what looks like an anus, I might add, and the thing eats them alive, bite by bite! That's messed up!
*It looks like a very dangerous backdoor to me.
3.) They have three hearts...three green hearts.
4.) Their Tentacles.
This one kind of goes without saying. They are snake-like, numerous and slimy. Oh, and they can completely rip you to shreds. Not only are they unbelievably strong, but the suction cups have little curved claws on them, not unlike teeth.
Which brings me to my next point:
5.)The Giant Squid.
In 1978 a naval vessel, the USS Stein was damaged by a giant squid. It left scrapes long its hull from those freaky-ass teeth things. They can grow to be 14 metres, or 46 feet long.
Needless to say, you see one...you're dead.
6.) Just look at them. Fuck.
I could go on and on about these things. Literally. But, I thought that maybe this video could speak for me.
Oh, and I'm sure a lot of you have pondered, at least once over the years, "I wonder why it is that Katie never goes swimming...hm...puzzling."
Well my friends: This is fucking why, you asshole.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mGMT99i00M4
